Anais Rosa: She Believed She Could, So She Did

Being a patient is difficult. I used to be on the other side, helping and treating others. However, thankfully, I had a very good team with me after the accident happened: Doctors, PAs, nurses, CNAs, physical therapists. They were all awesome, had a lot of empathy, and treated me with respect. This experience changed everything. If at this moment I was practicing medicine, I would treat my patients with more empathy, and focus more on them and base everything on them. I believe that for any healthcare provider, the medical field is very overwhelming, and it can be easy to lose your vision. You need to base everything on the patient. Your decisions need to be based on the patient. Put yourself in the patient’s place, and everything will be different. The patient is the most important thing. Above the money, title, and fame, you need to base your decisions on the patient. 

Ever since the accident, I’ve always thought of this phrase: “She believed she could, so she did.” I repeated this all over again whenever I was trying to do something and I couldn’t, or if everything was hard, I talked about this phrase. I decided that this is my new life, and this is my reality now. I have 2 options. To go on, or just stay at the bed crying and depressed, not doing anything at all. I decided that I was going to enjoy this second opportunity that I had, and to enjoy the little things, because life can change in one second. I decided that I was going to try to live my life as I was doing before my accident. Of course, it was different, and I had to make many adjustments. I enjoy everything that I can do, including the little things: enjoying time with my family, and enjoying every little thing in my life since the accident. Before the accident, I was so focused on my plans, that I didn’t do other things. I just studied at my apartment, because I always had a plan and was very organized. I wanted everything done in a certain way. If you are studying or working, take a little bit of your time to go out with your dog, or go out and take in a good breath of air, or eat the things that you want to eat. I believe that before the accident, I was focused on other things and couldn’t enjoy them. Now, I just breathe and enjoy everything I can. If my nephew and my niece are here, I take a few minutes to see them playing. It’s the little things in life that you learn to appreciate more. Before the accident, I had my two legs. I could do a lot more things. Now, I can still do things, but differently. Since it’s a little bit more challenging,  that’s why I appreciate everything now. 

I started using social media last year. At first, I was looking for other hemipelvectomy amputees. The procedure is very rare, so there aren’t a lot of information for people like me. I decided to share my story and journey, so that others can learn about my story, and so that I can connect with other amputees as well. That’s when I decided to start sharing my story on Instagram. In the future, I would like to be a motivational speaker to others, because it’s important for me to share my story with others. A lot of people don’t know about hemipelvectomies, phantom pain, or how prosthetic legs work. I’ve also been sharing my progress with physical therapy, my prosthetic legs, and my frustration. People will DM me and thank me for being open, and sharing my story and journey. People have been responding well to my posts. On Instagram, I follow a couple of other people who are hemipelvectomy amputees, and some of them choose to share their story on social media as well. I have asked them about their experience with prosthetics whenever I had problems with mine. It has been amazing to ask questions to other people who have the same limitations and same prosthetics. Social media now makes it easier to connect with others better.

In our lives, we have ups and downs. That’s what life consists of. Life is not easy, so on occasions, we can have accidents or things that happen unexpectedly. We can lose hope and feel sad and frustrated, and we don’t have an understanding of why this is happening to us. I asked on a lot of occasions why this happened to me. I’m a good person, and I was doing good things to help others. Just cry, because you need to, but dry your tears. Pull your head up. Regain your strength, and remember that you have a purpose in your life. You need to never give up. Go ahead with your life, and everything will be better at some point. Maybe right now, you don’t see it. I didn’t see it when people told me that I’d be walking and I’d have a prosthetic leg. I was thinking, “yeah right, why are you telling me that?” But when I remember those days, I said, “Hey, look how well you are doing now! When people told you that, you didn’t believe it.” However, you need to believe in yourself that everything will be better.

I still have my days when I want to stay in bed and do nothing. I get frustrated on some occasions when I think about my life before the accident. It’s a lot of ups and downs emotionally, but it’s normal to get frustrated. Even before the accident, I got frustrated for other things. Now, I think the days that are difficult for me are the days I have phantom pain. Those days, I hate everything, and I don’t want to think about anything. It’s a reminder that I don’t have my legs and that my life has changed. 

Mental health is very compromised after a traumatic experience. Everyone deals with situations differently, but after the traumatic event I went through, my injuries were not only physical but also mental. The Anais before September 16, 2019 was very different in many aspects. After I became dependent on others to take care of me, in a bed and in pain, I tried to be strong, but deep inside I was shattered. God gave me a lot of strength, but therapy and the right medications were lifesavers. What has helped me a lot is therapy. At the beginning, I thought I was strong and didn’t need help. However, when you open yourself up to a therapist, and you start to work in that aspect of your life, it becomes a little bit easier. 

But I have days that I don’t care about anything at all, and I say to myself, “You have to wake up, and do your thing. You are alive. Look at the things that you have been achieving lately. Look at what you have around you.” I don’t let myself to be in low places a lot. It’s part of my day, but I try to regain my strength again and continue with my day.  Right now, I am still working with my therapist to continue my spiritual healing. We need to give mental health the importance that it deserves, and it should be a vital part of the treatment of patients that had a traumatic event such as mine, or any other situation that can compromise mental health.

In the future, I want to be able to help others. I don’t know if I will be able to continue my pathway of practicing medicine. If at some point I’m not able to do it, I think that with my knowledge of medicine and my experience as a patient, I could do other things to help others. I don’t need to practice medicine to help others. Eventually, I want to be part of an organization, or be able to visit other people who have had difficult situations or traumatic accidents like mine.